Will I Ever Know Who I Really Am?
by niki839037
Summary: Roxas loses his memory in a bad accident. When he finally rediscovers himself, will he be able to make the decision to stay with his old boyfriend or go with the one he now loves?


_**Chapter 1**_

_Who am I? I'd like to know. The nurses told me my name was Roxas but, that's not what I'm talking about. I don't care about my name. Your name says nothing about you as a person. Or...does it? I'm not sure. But, I guess, that's how I think. Whoever _I_ is. But, I guess I may never know who I am. Or who I is. But, that's okay. Or, at least, I think it is._

I opened my eyes and waited for them to adjust before flinging my legs off the side of my hospital bed and sitting up, just looking at my feet. I was still tired but I didn't care. I was fine. At least, I felt fine. I don't know why the doctors haven't released me yet. Though, I have no idea where I'd be released _to_ if they did. I just have me and the clothes they gave me. Or, that's all I think I have.

Apparently I had a concussion and I forgot some stuff. Though, I have no idea what those things could be. I mean, is what you forgot really that important if you forgot it? If you forgot it, it couldn't _possibly_ be _that_ important. Could it? But whatever.

Anyways, yesterday I overheard some nurses talking to my doctor about releasing me today. I'm kinda worried about it. Like I said, I don't know where I'd go. I don't know anyone. (And if I did I don't know them anymore...) I'm...alone. Ugh. I've got to stop jumping to conclusions like that. One, the doctors wouldn't throw me out into the world alone, would they? And two, it's not exactly set in stone I'd be released today, Is it? No. So why am I worrying so much about this? Ugh.

Well, anyways. _Ahem_. My name (Is apparently) Roxas Hikari. I'm apparently a Sophomore at Destiny High. According to some of the student nurses from the High School, I'm a loner. Which apparently means I don't have many friends and if I do I only am friends with them for awhile before making friends with someone else. But, whatever that means. Though, the volunteer nurses could not tell me if I was single or not because apparently, no one knew.

I glanced at the clock on the wall, right beside the tv set. _12:36 am..._ Whatever. I won't be getting back to sleep anytime soon. I bent slowly, as to not reopen my stitches on my side and back, to my right and grabbed the paper and pencil the nurses had set there for me. After learning I couldn't get to sleep most nights, they got me paper and pencil to write, draw, or create something with. Hey, at least it's _something_ to do. Better then sitting on my ass being lazy and watching tv for 5 hours waiting for the doctor to come check on me.

I began to draw, silly things, magical things, and such things that wouldn't exist. According to one of my nurses, I used to write a lot. That may explain why I love to write. But, I like to draw at times like these. The drawing inspires my writing, and helps it come to "life" as someone put it.

While I was really concentrating on drawing something I made up called a_ keyblade,_ my door slowly creaked open, a very tall boy, resembling me to a T, stepped in. My eyes widened. Who was this? Were they dangerous? Did they know..._me?_ Or...the old me?

"Roxas..." The man practically whispered, almost tripping in his sprint to the side of my bed. Tears were flowing down his face, as well as sweat, and he was panting heavily. Who...who _was_ this?

"Roxas, you- you're being let out today..." The man trailed off, a hint of excitement in his voice. Hmm...interesting.

"Okay. Um..." I trailed off, unsure if I should really ask him. Before, 3 kids came in, claiming to be friends with me and when I asked them who they were, they blew up at me. The nurses had to "escort" them out. Well, there's no nurses here now...if he _did_ get mad I could always just talk to him, find out who I really am. He might tell me...

"Yes?" He asked, shocking me out of my thoughts. My eyes flinched to his, and we had a stare down for a moment before I spoke softly.

"W-Who...who are you?" I asked, my voice barely audible. His eyes widened before he cursed, quite loudly, and looked away for a minute, running a hand through his hair. He sighed heavily.

"Hayner, Pence, and Olette _told_ me he probably wouldn't remember..." He muttered before looking back at me, new determination in his eyes. "I know, you probably don't remember me, or anything else for that matter..." He started. I nodded, urging him to continue. "But, I'm your brother." He stated, putting a hand in front of me. "Since you 'haven't met me before', shake. I'm Cloud. Cloud Hikari." He- I mean Cloud, stated. I nodded, taking his hand in mine.

"I'm Roxas. Roxas Hikari. Though, you probably already know that. And who I is." He brows furrowed as I spoke my last sentence. I nodded, already knowing he wouldn't understand. "I, I as in...who I was. What was my personality. You know?" I asked, hoping he did. Realization flooded in his eyes and he nodded.

"Yes, well. Anyways." He began, wiping sweat off his face. "Like I said before. You're being released today." He stated. I nodded. He started again. "So...shouldn't you...I don't know...get ready?" He asked me, moving his hands in a 'move it' fashion. I looked at him, confused.

"But, isn't it like, 2 am?" I asked, unsure. He checked his cellphone and shook his head, handing the small device to me to prove it. Yup. He was right. The cellphone read 8:32 am. I shook my head in confusion. "But...oh." I suddenly realized as I looked to my left, the giant pile of pictures I drew. It must have been _hours_! But, why hasn't my doctor checked on me yet then? As soon as that thought processed, my doctor, Dr. Vexen, stepped through the door. He smiled at me kindly.

"Hello, Roxas. How are you today?" He asked me the same questions he'd asked me since I 'woke up'. I nodded. That meant I was fine. He nodded back and scribbled something onto his clipboard. "Okay, well, as soon as you get your things together, you're free to go!" He stated cheerfully. I nodded and smiled a little as he stepped out the door and waited until I couldn't hear his footsteps anymore before sighing.

"Are you okay?" Cloud, I believe it was, sat down on the edge of the bed and put a hand on my shoulder. I wasn't to comfortable with him touching me, as I really didn't know him, even _if_ I once did. Ugh.

"Yeah." I replied, getting up carefully after pulling out my IV gently. He nodded, a little wary, before standing and getting everything for me before I changed in the bathroom and stepped out of my old room. I looked back at the now closed door before continuing on. My only memories I have at the moment are of me in that room. Now, I have to go out and actually _live_. And truthfully, I'm kind of scared.


End file.
